Not Even One

Here I am , typing and speaking out in my blog.

I can't do my homework.
I seriously need someone to talk to .
But i can't seem to think of any.
Everyone is busy with their life, its irritating to keep bugging people.
Its not that i don't have friends that I can talk to.
Its just that , sometimes, the situation is not suitable.
I'm very lost.
For almost a year. I kept the secret, till yesterday.
I leaked.
The answer i got was, why didn't i say it out earlier.

True. Why didn't i say it out earlier?
Cuz I was afraid.
In fact, i'm still afraid. but somehow i just needed to let it out.
They claimed that they couldn't help anything, since its already almost one year
I understand. But it was just so hard for me to say.
How could i have said it?
I was ashamed .

For some period of time i did not think of the incident.
Unless i saw him, or.. till yesterday.
My friend said that i have to face it, but not run away from it.
In the end, i had nightmares
and the whole day today, i really feel very very uncomfortable.

I'm struggling .
I don't know what to do. Who to talk to. :(